I really don't have time for this....

I need to be to someone's house in a few minutes to can my flour, sugar, and salt. I am excited about my emergency preparedness, and want to get it done before something happens.

Tyler's party was a lot of fun. I will post pics soon. I need to assign one person the camera at these fetes so I don't get such disjointed pics. Ugh. 14 shots of one kid in the jumper, and none of her opening gifts?? LOL.

Her baptism is set for the 27th, at 11am at the Dexter bldg. I am so lucky that another mom is so gung ho (it only being her second child) and is willing to set up the program, and print it out. Yay. I want Tyler's day to be special, but I am happy to hand it to someone else to do. :D I am so relieved that this is my last one. It is a lot of work and stress, and I just don't need either right now. :D

On a sad note, the girl I was trying to fellowship back into church has been attacking Tyler. I have defended Ty against these ridiculous accusations but her feelings are hurt. I have been driving the girls to school, and will continue I guess. They don't miss the bus, that is for sure. I don't understand how an adult feels it is okay to attack a child. She even admitted that it 'looked' like Tyler pushed her daughter down the bus steps. She didn't even see it, her older daughter told her. But, when I asked the bus driver, she said nothing like that happened,that the daughter was upset for being reprimanded. When I explained this to the mom, she said I was in denial. LOL. THe bus driver is in a conspiracy with me?? Whatever. I just feel bad that I have to pull completely away for the safety and well being of my kids. I hope she finds what she needs at church and continues to go. I just can't be the one to do it anymore.

Off to shower and arrive late for my appt.

Things change.

Bill and I, like most couples we know, started our lives together on a shoestring. Bill has always been in construction, and we rode ups and downs for many years. Our food budget was always the hardest hit, and I got very creative keeping the kids fed. The day Brittany turned eight, was right after our 15th paycheck. The check on the first went to rent, and food, and that was it. The one on the 15th was more flexible. It went for utilities, food, and whatever extra we absolutely needed. Brittany turned eight on the 19th, right after our check had cleared and I had a few dollars. But, I didn't have a car. So, I loaded 2 year old Hunter and 9 month old Chandler into the stroller, clamped 4yr old Kailey's hand to the stroller, and set off with Brittany and almost 7 yr old Cory to the strip mall 1/2 a mile away. All that was there was a Hallmark store, so we went in. For her birthday she got a copy of the Secret Garden, a cute little statuette, and a couple things of candy. I felt bad that I had to drag her, and she didn't get any surprises. We then wandered thru the grocery store and got a cake mix, some frosting, and decorations.

We walked home. I wanted to cry that I couldn't do better for her. But, she never complained.

Fast forward 12 1/2 years. It is now time for my youngest to turn eight. And how different are our circumstances. We are in no way financially solvent, but we are getting closer every day. We are throwing Tyler a BBQ jumper party. Same thing we did for Cameryn in January. I told Tyler she could pick anything she wanted for her party and that is what she wanted. Bill told me today to rent either a popcorn machine..or a cotton candy machine. We are also taking the kids to Disneyland to celebrate. Now, we have passes, so our put out is just gas. But the contrast is stark in my mind. How I wish I could go back and fix Brittany's eighth birthday, and give her some of Tyler's good fortune.

Maybe a turnaround.

I have been so worried about Cory. Since his release, he has had no motivation. He lived with Bill's nephew for a while, who withheld food unless he did a specific list of things each day. As much as this grated on me, at least he had somewhere to sleep, and almost enough food. Nephew treated Cory as if he were a new recruit and he was the sargent. On top of this, Cory was not to mention church, his scriptures, or anything religion related in his home. Cory was severely yelled at when he stopped on the street to talk to a couple of missionaries. They, of course, were excited to find a member, and invited him to church. Cory was in a lot of trouble for that. We needed to find a new home, and fast.

So, he asked his good friend if he could move in with his family, and he would pay the rent he was giving to Nephew, to them. This family is strong in the gospel, and insisted Cory not only go to church (he was given the choice of the singles ward, or their family ward) but he enrolled in institute and a few college classes. I was happy to pay the rent to her. He called last week, and said he was given a calling. Yay!! He is on the 'Break the Fast' committee. LOL.

But even better. He said the Bishop has been talking to him and wants to ordain him an elder. I asked Cory if he had been completely honest with the bishop as to why he was in the group home and he said he had. OMSTars!! This is so exciting!! Of course, my mind ran ahead and I wondered to Bill if this meant Cory could serve a mission. He is still nineteen, and I think the cut off is 24. Miles away. A mission is a dream I gave up the night the police came. To think it may be possible after all is more than I ever thought possible. A true blessing.

Cory called tonight, and Bill told him my mind had already made the connection. Cory was a little disappointed because he wanted to surprise me with it. I am sorry, Son, but your mama is too excited to wait for the surprise. LOL.

I am giddy.

little of this and that

I have been helping Mom with her house. She has lived in this house 20 years this March. Things need help. Over the years, I have learned a few home improvement things from Bill, so I was able to install a new curtain rod, spackle the holes of the old one, AND spackled the gouges from the recliner in the dining room wall, and then paint and blend it in. I must say,it all looked good. Bill says he is almost ready to hire me. LOL. My big project over there will be painting the trim on the outside of the house. It is the same color as the stucco, and I hate it. Her stucco is a tan, with yellowish undertones, so I think a sage green, or a wedgwood blue would be pretty. Too bad I don't know a painter....oh wait! I do....he just is too busy right now. Shoot.

The repo company lowered Bill's wages. They had given him a higher rate while he got going good, and we were feeling it was just barely enough to get us by, until the county picks up more. Now with them shaving 25% off his take rather than 12, Bill has to do a lot of the work himself rather than piecing it out to his workers. This has made them mad, but what can we do?? I want the county to pick up, but not like last time. We put thousands of our own money into materials with the promise we would be paid in 2-3 weeks, and it took 8 weeks. We just about sunk. If we get enough county work to use profits from the last job to pay for this job, then it will be great. But one every now and then doesn't work.

So far, Bill and the two boys are too sick for church. Bill has been really sick all week, but still went to work every day. Yesterday he spent most of the day in bed, and today will be the same I guess. He has to work tomorrow and all week again, so he may as well get caught up while he can. Kailey is in getting ready to go right now. She hasn't been in months again, so I hope it goes well.

I had better go do what I need to do to be there on time. :D

The bike

Chandler is a whiz on wheels. When he was four, he took Cory's bike, got a stool, climbed up and rode in circles on the back patio til he had it down. He got his first skateboard at 7, is incredibly talented on it, and hopes to be sponsored some day. He hasn't had a bike in a while, after leaving his in the rain and ruining it. Money does not grow on trees. So, he has used his razor scooter and his board for any entertainment.

Lately though, he has wanted to get back into BMXing. He has asked no less than 45, 231 times for a bike for his birthday (in August. Can you imagine my next six months??) This boy has a handle on nagging. Then the neighbor offered him his extra, barely used bike for 50 dollars. There is no way Chan has that kind of money because 1. I only hand out money for extra chores. Extra chores are only allowed after your room, homework, and regular chores are done. and 2, everytime they have a few dollars in their pocket, they run to the store and buy candy, ice cream, or chips. I need to work on this. Anyway, he begged and pleaded and promised that if we bought him an early birthday gift, he would be so helpful and do extra chores to help pay for it. I thought about it for a few days, and finally agreed to pay for the bike and in return he would throw no more temper tantrums and slam his door. He would also do his homework and chores each day before disappearing on it. He quickly agreed, and I know in my heart that none of it will last. But, at least the nagging has ceased....until the next thing he absolutely has to have.

I am starting daycare again, for the same family I moved out from under. They are very particular about who watches their kids, and I know, both being cops, that they checked Bill and I out very thoroughly before allowing me to watch their three little girls. Since I moved six months ago, she has had a rough time. I feel badly, but we had no choice, and she understands that, on all levels. Anyway, I started watching the girls when they were 4, 19 months, and six months. They were just babies, and I got very attached. Having them a minimum of 56 hours a week, and usually closer to 70, I was really their second mommy. Everything Idid, I just dragged them along. The only downside is I never got a nap. :D I had them last weekend while Connie recovered from a bad back. I loved it. They are now almost 6, 3 and 2. Taking them to church was an experience, as we need to leave the house by 8:15 at the latest, and I now had 8 kids to get ready. But, we did it.I realize it was a honeymoon phase, and that the lovey dovey between Tyler and Adrianne will quickly be replaced by their loud frustrations with each other. But, it is all good.

I have also been playing at being a laborer for Bill. There are a lot of advantages to me being his helper. One, he doesn't have to pay me. That is a biggie. We also get to spend a lot of time together. Yesterday he even had me paint, and touch up. It is boring work, but has to be done. Eventually, I would like to be an actual help. :D

My boring life

Happily, I think my life has settled down enough to say "I lead a boring life" Yay!! It has been a long time coming. Unfortunately, this doesn't bode well for blogging. :D

Yesterday, Chandler went around to everyone, saying he didn't want to spend the day in the house, can we go to the mall?? The closest mall is 15 miles away. Bill worked a long week, and was looking forward to a relaxing day, and I was in the middle of cleaning my room. We decided to go ahead and go to the mall. I started hollerin' ....uh....calling for the girls to get their shoes and brush their hair. We are ready to walk out the door, and Chan says "If Hunter isn't going, neither am I" Sheesh. So, since the girls were already pumped and at the door, we went. We had a good time, and I really tried not to think of all I had at home to do.

Brittany and Tyler are coming over today. It was nice having her visit this week. She even invited a friend over one night. She is not telling Tyler that it is Superbowl Sunday. He will refuse to come. Apparently he really hates football. LOL. This is one habit Bill just couldn't kick when he joined the church. I am okay with it since he quit the smoking, and the beer. :D He is thrilled every year we are on the early schedule and he doesn't miss kickoff. But, at least he doesn't chafe to get home on the late schedule. But, boy, does that TV come on as soon as we walk in the door. :/

Anyway, we are having hot wings, chili cheese dip, and candy for each time your team scores. The kids always hope for high scorers.

Off to get ready for church

Another new blog.

I miss the outlet blogging allows. I miss being able to type out my feelings, and then moving forward with whatever decision I have made. But, alas, my other blog is locking me out due to lack of attention. When it is done with it's temper fit, maybe I can properly remember it's password. LOL.

We are in the new house, new ward, new schools. We have been here five months now, and things have really settled down for us. Kailey is doing well, if you don't count her grades. I have no idea why she just doesn't care. The only passion I have seen from her over school involves not wanting to retake the CAHSEE, and who is dating who this week.

Bill's business is doing okay. I am waiting for the day when our income is more than the taxes, payroll, materials and insurances it takes to do the job. As the county jobs increase we will be doing better.

Hunter is having a few difficulties adjusting. I am thinking he wanted to impress his new friends with how cool he can be, and is losing sight of what is important in the meantime. He is on track for grade 8 1/2. It is a special program to integrate him into high school, on the high school campus, but he won't be allowed any of the fun of high school til he shows an improvement. Alas, Chandler will be right there with him. Sigh. I have no idea what derailed these kids. They all got decent grades as small kids, and now... Cameryn and Tyler both do well. I hope I can keep them motivated for good grades.

So, Bill has been doing 2-3 repo houses a week. This keeps him,two journeymen, and two laborers busy. He usually can take off one or two days a week for important stuff...lunch out, grocery shopping, and urgent trips to WalMart. So, we invited Brittany to come stay a few days while her SO is out of state working. She came yesterday, and her and the kids had a good time bonding. She brought her sewing machine, and really impressed them with her mad skillz. I have no idea where she got it because I hate to sew....and I don't think I have touched one in over 30 years. Anyway, one of his journeyman pulled a dummy yesterday, and fell off a ladder.He had secured it on a drop cloth...and it slid down the wall, with him still on it. He called in today. This journeyman's laborer was hired because he is the husband of a good friend of mine, and he was desperate for work..the first day or two. He has been late, left early, or hasn't shown five of the eight days Bill scheduled him. This morning it was definite that he really didn't want to work. He told Bill he wanted more hours, and Bill told him he had to show dependability first. He is more desperate for a paycheck, and I refuse to just hand those out willy nilly. So two guys down. He then asks Brittany to come join him. Sigh. There go my plans for hanging out together today. Bill is very apologetic, but it can't be helped. We are again looking for employees. Where do you find the guys who want the paycheck, but are willing to work for it?? Okay, I concede, painting sucks. But, it can pay the bills, and dare I say, become a career. We have never been rich, but we have never missed a meal, either.

This is the first time Brittany has spent time with us, since her unseen departure almost two years ago. I am taking baby steps. Her SO will be out of town off an on for the next six months. This bodes well for their financial situation, and maybe more visits for us. She said this morning that if needed, she would be happy to work with Dad more often, and just stay with us while Tyler is in Colorado. I didn't want to scare her off with my exuberant cheering....so I waited til I was alone in the bathroom. :D Tonight we grill another tritip roast in her honor. She has never tasted our own little bit of Heaven. I think she will like it.

I love no sugar added Klondike ice cream sandwiches. I can set it down and it doesn't melt all over the paper towel. Plus, it tastes good. Since I delivered Tyler seven years, 11 months ago, I have dropped 48 pounds, with 32 in the last 18 months or so. Talk about slow and steady wins the race. LOL I do notice that most of that weight was after my diabetes diagnosis. Maybe, I can lose more, and totally get rid of the diabetes?? Wouldn't that be so cool?? I still have bad days where I swear the sugars are stewing my brains, and coherent thought is a pipedream.My tummy hurts, and I ust feel like crap all around. But they are becoming fewer and further between.

I am no longer employed, and I see it as a blessing. I was working for the same repo company that Bill paints for. I would go in when the house was totally remodeled, and clean it. In the beginning I had issues as I got into my rhythm. But once I did, I was told I was one of their better, more dependable cleaners, and I rarely got call backs. I started in August, right after we moved here. The middle of December I got a call back. I was surprised, and when I got out there, I had forgotten to take down the ceiling fixtures and clean them. Sometimes I just can't see very well and it wasn't til I climbed up on the ladder that I saw they were actually very dirty. I was embarrassed, and vowed to do better. Soon, I was getting a complaint on every other house. I was so perplexed, because I was doing everything I had been doing all along. What was going on?? The week between Christmas and new year, Bill came to help me with a house to boost my confidence. I was feeling rather low at this point. It was raining that day, and in my contract it states I don't have to do the outside windows in the rain. I sent Cory out to do them anyway, much to his chagrin. Bill and I scrubbed the rest of the house (Cory is sloooow) and when we left, we agreed it looked really good. Yeah, I got a complaint. Debris on the floor and the windows looked terrible. Bill and I were both so baffled. I went out a few days later, cleaned the windows again(totally more effective in the sunshine) and swept up a cup of dead roaches. I called boss in Arizona and told him the only debris I could find were the dead bugs, and as we had cleaned them up originally, I absolutely had no control of more coming out and dying. He agreed, and said I was doing a bang up job, keep it up. The next house was perfect. It was old and tiny, and I spent four hours cleaning the wall heater. Yuck. But the next one I tried to clean with the painter there. Bill works for one project manager, Dennis, and I had four, Dennis, Brent, Neal, and Russ. This was Neal's house, and he was rather laid back on keeping to the schedule. I was frustrated because as I clean I mentally lock off each room and do not enter them at all. And this big galoot was walking on my freshly mopped/vaccuumed floors. I complained, made Neal mad, and he told Chris, my boss in AZ, that he did NOT want me on any more of his houses. The next house was built in 1904, and had at some point, homeowners who didn't care. I used goo be gone on the stone tile in the kitchen, spraying and scraping on my hands and knees for hours. Chris called said Brent complained, and I just lost it. I sat and cried, and called Bill. He was as confused as I was because I had been doing so well, and he didn't see what I was doing to get so many complaints all the sudden. After crying (tears do not act as a good cleaner) and scraping for another hour, I called Chris back. I told him I was done. I was apparently not cut out to clean houses, and even though I gave it my best shot, I couldn't do it. Part of the problem too, was they kept assigning more than one house in a day. With an hour travel at least, and four-six hours on each house, this was killing me. He said he was glad I called, because he was trying to build the nerve to call me and tell me it wasn't working. So, basically I quit right before I could be fired. I called Bill back, told him I had quit, and he was quiet. We depend on every dime right now. I knew he was upset, but not at me. More at the situation which neither of us understood at the time. Bill was praying on the way home as to what we should do now, and how are we going to make it?? He got a very strong impression telling him that "Now she can be a mom" He felt such peace, and knew me quitting was the right thing. It certainly explains why all the sudden I couldn't do it. :D

Off to take care of my two sick little girls. Hopefully Cameryn's tummy ache will go away soon. She has had it for three days now. Tyler's is just sympathy pains. :D